I’ve been feeling a lot of strong emotions lately, and trying to figure out what to do with them. Ideally, it’s best to feel the emotion fully in the moment, and let it flow through you, not becoming attached to it. Sometimes, though, I’m in a situation where it’s not appropriate to cry or show anger, such as in the workplace. In that case, I tend to supress the feeling, but then find that I do have to deal with it sooner or later, and sometimes it has grown bigger in the interim.
The emotions that I have the most trouble with are ones that are essentially reactions to other people’s strong emotions. I am an empath, and when someone around me is feeling something very strongly, I tend to pick up on it and either share the feeling, or blame myself for it in some way, which can cause other emotions to arise. Usually if it’s a situation that makes me upset, I can let go of it pretty quickly. But dealing with others’ feelings is more difficult.
In the past I tended to process my emotions internally, in my head or in a journal, rather than speaking out loud about them with others. More recently I’ve been in situations where I’ve been doing a lot of verbal processing, which has been both good and bad. Good, in that I can get ideas and new perspectives from talking with friends. Bad, in that it tends to tire me out very quickly. And it can also be a burden on the friends.
So now I’m trying to find a good balance for all of this. To be open and honest with those I love, without overburdening them with my emotions. To process things internally, without hanging onto them in an unhealthy way. To express my emotions authentically as they come up, but not let them control me. As I write this, it seems to me that what I’m working with is a basic aspect of being human, and learning to be a better person.
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